I’ve been living in Madrid now for around 2 months and I have to say it’s awesome! I’ve noticed a few strange things and it was supposed to be 10 things but it’s a weirder country than I thought..so here are a few things I've learnt during my time here:
1) Spanish students complain all the time about how much they have to study. They all claim to spend at least 3 or 4 hours studying a day although their definition of studying as far as I can tell is sitting in front of the computer watching How I Met Your Mother with their textbook open somewhere near them or doing something called “pasar apuntes” (passing notes) which as far as I can tell is just copying hand written notes onto the computer without ever actually reading them properly.
2) G & T is a real man’s drink. Yes, famous in England for being Pat Butcher’s tipple of choice here it’s about as manly as it gets! Probably not helping the view that Spanish men tend to be a bit girly..
3) Cups of tea don’t exist. It’s basically impossible to buy a cup of tea here. Despite explaining to the bar staff exactly how it’s made i.e. a bit of milk & hot water (not exactly rocket science) you inevitably end up with either hot UHT milk with a tea bag, hot water with a tea bag in, or milk & hot water without a tea bag.
4) People have gotten fat! When I was here in 2009 studying I remember noting that it was the skinniest part of the world I’ve ever been in, I hardly remember meeting anyone overweight and now it seems that more and more people are a bit well, chunky! Apparently it’s because of the financial crisis and people are shopping in worse super markets with lower quality food. Personally I blame it on the fact that at everyone’s house I’ve been to for dinner they seem to eat chocolate, natillas & ice cream for dessert on a daily basis!
5) There are homeless people everyone – in my neighbourhood there are at least 10 or 15 people sleeping rough, and various others begging outside of shops and they’re in every single neighbourhood in Madrid as far as I can tell.
6) Long working hours - apparently the Spanish work an average of 2 hours longer per day than their European counterparts but as far as I can see they’re also the least productive. The working day seem to consist of arriving, getting a cup of coffee, having a chat, working for 30 mins then having a breakfast break, bit of work, smoking break, one more hour then home for over an hour & a half for lunch, followed by an afternoon drinking coffee. And they wonder why their economy is so bad..
7) Football – the Spanish are obsessed with football! They have 4 dedicated national football newspapers including the best selling paper MARCA & in almost every bar you go to their will be someone talking about football & there are kids playing in the street wherever you go. They also play really well in general although they are incapable of dealing with a nice hefty English style long ball..I scored 5 goals last game all in this way!
8) Awful TV – apparently British TV is known all around the world as being pretty bad but it’s nothing compared to the rubbish they put on here. They’re obsessed with Question Time style round table debates but being Spanish they all just end up shouting over each other and there’s no David Dimbleby equivalent to keep the peace! They also have TV shows which last hours discussing reality shows like Big Brother. Imagine Big Brothers Little Brother but lasting the whole evening. Spanish soap operas make Home and Away look like a Spielberg production. Their comedy shows are like our comedy shows except with all the funny bits taken out. Their adverts are like something from the 80's. Their most famous late night TV show is “La Hormiga"(The Ant) which is a puppet conducting interviews & they have women commentating no the football which wouldn't be bad if those women actually knew anything about football, which they don't. I think the only criteria for them getting the job is that they are skinny, attractive & willing to wear very tight clothes.
9) Rubbish collection – rubbish is collected on a daily basis..sound good, right? Not when they do it 1am in the morning..who ever came up with that bright idea deserves to be shot..which wouldn't surprise me seeing the amount of extremists there are here.
10) It stinks – Madrid is the worst smelling city I’ve ever been in. The drains smell, there’s dog poo everywhere, and the wheely bins on every street stink. Everyone told me it was because of the rain, then it rained, and it still smelt. Conclusion: the Spanish smell.
11) Public Transport is AWESOME. Cheap, clean, on time and an extensive network of trains & buses (which never break down) and a great metro system which costs around 80p a journey if you buy a 10 pass ticket. England should really use it as an example.
12) Spanish people have the curious ability to be able to speak for a long time, without actually saying anything at all. The first minute of a story can go something like “oye, pues a ver, es que, sabes lo que pasa? Joe tronk, ya ves..me refiero..lo que quiero decirte es queeeee joe sabes tia, a ver. Pues nada ya te digo..yo que se..” all they’ve really said is "I’m going to tell you something" yet they spend a minute telling you that.
13) And finally if you don’t speak Spanish don’t go to parties here! You just end up getting left with the guy that speaks English on the basis that well, he can speak English! He also tends to be the weird guy at the party that no-one else wants to speak to hence why they’re happy to leave him with you, and he can only speak English because he spends his time alone in his room studying English leaving you with the English language as the only topic of conversation..
Note: I actually love living in this country!!!!
